How anti-LGBTQ legislation is impacting employees and their families

Emily Pesce would like to take her family and kids to visit her parents at their home in Florida. But as a trans woman who's all too aware of anti-LGBTQ legislation sweeping the nation, and particularly the Sunshine State, she no longer feels safe doing so. 

"My mom is paralyzed with fear, and our relationship is affected by me being trans — not because she can't accept me, but because she's convinced that someone is going to hurt me or my family," Pesce says. "I can't go [to Florida] and I can't bring my family."

There have been more anti-LGBTQ bills introduced in state houses this year than in each of the previous five years, according to the Human Rights Campaign. So far in 2023, over 520 bills have been introduced, including over 220 specifically targeting transgender and non-binary people. Seventy anti-LGBTQ laws have been enacted, including Florida's so-called "don't say gay" laws prohibiting the discussion of sexual orientation and gender identities in public schools, and Iowa's restrictions on gender affirming care.  

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Pesce's experience illuminates the fact that anti-LGBTQ legislation does not just impact individuals, but entire family units, whether they are comprised of queer children or caregivers. In addition to being a partner and a mother, Pesce is also the CEO of Joon Therapy, a mental health counseling service for teens and adults. She's all too familiar with the snowball effect anti-LGBTQ sentiment is having on every member and ally of the community. 

"We underestimate the mental stress that this can cause to families," she says. In her own experience, she and her partner work to be open and honest with their kids about the news and the potential realities they may soon face, while being careful not to let themselves be overwhelmed. 

"When Trump gave that speech on gender a couple months ago, that hit me really hard," Pesce recalls, referencing when former U.S. president Donald Trump, in January, vowed to punish doctors for providing gender affirming care should he be reelected. "I had to sit down with my partner and say, 'I had a bad day today. This really hurt.' And we talked through it. When and if the kids have questions, we try to address them as openly as we can, and maybe it's not full vulnerability because I'm their parent, but it's really important to be able to talk."

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The ability to talk openly, especially for kids whose families are impacted by this rhetoric, can be crucial — and can often feel inaccessible. Sixty-percent of LGBTQ youth who wanted mental health care in the past year were not able to get it, according to nonprofit The Trevor Project. When the same demographic feels supported by family, schools and communities, reports show a significantly lower rate of suicide attempts.

"[This news is] overwhelming to people who are just watching it from the outside," says Kate Steinle, chief clinical officer at Folx Health, a digital healthcare service provider that caters to the LGBTQ community. "But when you are a community member and it is your life and your health that is being talked about in these political circles, it's hard not to feel traumatized all the time. They're asking: 'Why can't you just let me live?'" 

Members of the LGBTQ community tend to be more likely to experience a mental health disorder in their lifetime, including depression, anxiety, PTSD, substance use disorders and suicidality, according to the American Psychiatric Association. For those juggling work, life and families, the workplace is often a place where this community looks for support. Fifty percent of LGBTQ employees wish their employer offered a mental health solution to address stress, anxiousness and sleep issues, according to Calm's 2023 workplace mental health report.  

"One of the opportunities for employers is to acknowledge that you're a parent — queer or otherwise. When you're hyperventilating a little bit, who are you going to talk to?" Pesce says. "Even in open and accepting places, they may not want people to notice this happening under their roof. Employers should acknowledge that much like school is an outlet for kids to get their pronouns respected, work is a place where this discourse probably happens." 

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Despite the wealth of information employers have on mental health struggles within the LGBTQ community, there is yet to be any quantifiable data on how anti-LGBTQ legislation is impacting workers. That makes employers' jobs difficult, says Dr. Sophia Murphy, an Arizona-based doctor of behavioral health and a licensed professional counselor with a specialization in sexology.  

"Anytime someone sees themselves on the outside or othered, it doesn't automatically translate to, 'I'm different and that's what makes me special,'" she says. "It goes to, 'I'm different and that's what makes me less than.' That's when we'll really see the psychological ramifications." 

At home, that could translate to a lack of sleep or restlessness due to anxiety or depression. In a workplace setting, that stress may lead to an employee's inability to focus, Dr. Murphy says. Fatigue could cause them to be late to work, or struggle to stay awake at their desk. This could prompt employers to perceive them as uninterested, lazy or unproductive, when the root cause is much deeper. 

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"There's one layer of this demographic [maybe being] depressed and anxious because of the stress associated with what's going on in the news," Dr. Murphy says. "But now they don't know if they can necessarily be themselves at work, because they're worried about job security, about political comments from co-workers, and that they could be denied a promotion because of how their boss sees them. It's even more nuanced and layered than before."

To start to soothe those fears, experts suggest ensuring that healthcare (and mental health care) offerings are comprehensive and culturally competent for LGBTQ employees. Consider providing unlimited mental health days, or even a "don't ask don't tell" PTO policy. Verbal reassurance or company-wide statements of support can go a long way in signaling that employees can be themselves at work. 

"How are you telling your employees that you understand it's a difficult time for families? How are you saying, 'you're not alone, you're part of a community'?" Pesce asks. "You don't have to say you can fix it all, [but you can say] that somebody here cares about you and cares about you more than your work output. It's really as simple as that."