4 things employers should know about bereavement

Three days is not enough: 4 things employers should know about bereavement

March 17, 2023 4:37 PM

Death is a difficult topic, to say the least, and one that's especially avoided in the workplace. But employers may be doing more harm than good by not investing more time and resources into bereavement benefits.

Empathy, an employee benefit platform that helps members navigate the administrative responsibilities and emotions of loss, surveyed 1,485 respondents who experienced the loss of an immediate family member in the last five years. The survey found that 92% of employees either take time off or adjust their work commitments to deal with loss, while 76% noticed their overall performance was harmed.

Death's impact goes beyond the individual employee — it can affect the workplace as a whole, from productivity to morale, explains Ron Gura, co-founder and CEO of Empathy.

"We talk so much about the cost of living, but it's important for us as benefit leaders to remember the meaningful cost of dying as well," he says. "It's similar to what you're already doing when someone is just back from maternity, and you understand they're going through a transition. But in this case, by its nature, it's negative."

Loss comes with financial and emotional costs that are by no means met by the average three-day bereavement leave in the U.S. Gura challenges employers to go beyond the bare minimum and create a workplace that supports all life transitions.

Here are four findings from Empathy that employers should consider when building their bereavement policies.

Loss is time-consuming

Even outside the actual experience of grief, which has no timeline, dealing with the financial matters that come with losing a loved one takes over a year, according to Empathy. Employees on average reported spending 12 hours per week on tasks like planning the funeral, handling any unpaid bills or debt and dividing assets according to the wishes of the deceased.

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By having a tool like Empathy, employees can get access to legal guidance personalized to their circumstances, saving time and energy better spent on processing the loss itself. Regardless of whether employers use Empathy, Gura believes employees shouldn't have to navigate this burden alone.

"This is when employers can use their volume and buying power to provide tools to navigate this, just like they're doing with fertility and maternity benefits," says Gura. "Not to discredit any of these benefits, but [bereavement] is even more inclusive because it doesn't skip any of us."

Loss is expensive

According to Empathy, the average cost of a funeral is $7,848, and the cost of resolving financial matters is $4,348. If there are legal matters like selling a home or lawyer fees, it costs employees an average of $4,967.

"Employers shouldn't necessarily have to pay for these financial costs, but remember presenteeism and absenteeism is impacting the bottom line," says Gura. "You have to go beyond sympathy and condolences to empathy and action."

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This may mean expanding existing benefits with bereaved employees in mind, like discounts and subsidies set aside for child care, pet care, house cleaning and mental health care. Additionally, employers will have to take a hard look at how much PTO and flexibility is in their current bereavement policy.

Three days are not enough

Employees will typically receive three days off after the loss of an immediate family member to handle urgent concerns like the funeral. Notably, in the wake of loss, 67% of employees took more non-bereavement leave than the days they spent on funeral planning. In other words, their bereavement leave wasn't enough time to handle the aftermath of loss.

Gura urges employers to offer at least two weeks so employees can get their immediate affairs in order. Moreover, employers should avoid making the amount of bereavement leave dependent on whether the deceased is an immediate family member.

"An employee's manager or HR should at least conduct a conversation with the employee to understand the nature of the relationship," says Gura. "An uncle or grandfather could be so meaningful and so heartbreaking."

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Gura applies the same logic to miscarriages and the loss of pets — employers shouldn't try to quantify the employee's degree of loss without the employee's input.

Value the experience of loss

Empathy found that 93% of employees suffered from at least one physical or mental symptom after loss, with 83% reporting feelings of anxiety. For 34% of respondents, four or more symptoms, like weight gain, changed sleeping patterns, unusual anger and irritability, and memory impairment, continue for a few months or more.

Beyond mental health care benefits and expanded leave, employers should allow for flexibility within the employee's day-to-day work schedule and even make sure managers have basic training in responding to grief in the workplace, notes Gura. Guiding employees to resources like grief counselors and support groups can also help employees find a community in what is likely an isolating moment in their lives.

"It doesn't matter who was lost, you should show up for employees," says Gura. "That's the essence of bereavement care. And if you do that right, employees will not forget."